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Dating Tips for Teens

November 18, 2008 By 2 Comments

This is a relatively short survival guide for teen dating and some teen love advice. It is based on my own personal experiences and from talking to many teenagers on a day to day basis. It is in no way a complete guide or a full list of dating tips for teens, but we will touch on some the issues teens confront when they get in to the dating game.

A question that crop up a lot is, what do I do if the person I like doesn’t like me? It is impossible to make someone love you; it just has to happen on its own. Unrequited or unreturned love and affection is one of the hardest things to deal with when you are a teen. Having a big crush on someone is hard sometimes, especially if they don’t even acknowledge your existence.

But you have to realize that all of the pain you have right now will evaporate when you do find someone who does love you.  You can’t make someone love you but you can try to be their friend, and friendship is often the best place to start with a relationship, and what might happen after that is up to faith. Let things progress naturally and at their own pace.

When you are a teen, emotions can tend to run high and this often leads to jealousy in a relationship.  But jealousy isn’t necessarily a bad thing if it is warranted or justified. If your boyfriend or girlfriend is constantly checking out or flirting with other potential boyfriends or girlfriends, then you have a right to be annoyed, and if he or she does not address your concerns then you should end the relationship, because it will not be healthy for you or them.

Irrational jealousy on the other hand is a different matter, and sometimes it stems from a bad relationship in the past where cheating or infidelity was involved. Bad past relationships can have a very drastic effect on future relationships and can lead to paranoia or being worried all the time about whether or not your partner is cheating. This can wreck good and healthy relationships, so you need to ask yourself whether your jealousy is justified or unjustified and work to resolve it.

Here are some dating tips for teens, for those who do not know if they are in love yet. Some teens have asked me, when will I know I am in love? Believe me; the answer to that question is very straightforward. You will know when it happens! It is important to note the distinction between love and obsession. Obsession is not love, just because you can’t stop thinking about somebody, doesn’t mean you are in love with them.

Lust is not love either; it is skin deep and not as meaningful. You can feel very strongly about how beautiful somebody is and be very attracted to them, but it is not love, and this is a trap most people will fall into a some point in their lives, and it just leads to unfulfilling relationships.

A big problem with teens and their love life is their parents. You may have old fashioned parents who believe that younger teens should not date, or maybe you have parents who disapprove of your current boyfriend or girlfriends. Some of you may not be on good terms with your parents or parent, and that can be a problem when dealing with this issue. When I get asked about dating tips for teens, this is the most requested tip.

At the end of the day, your parents have your best interests at heart, and have life experience under their belt, that is guiding the decisions that they make. The important thing to do is explain strongly how you feel to them and never do anything behind their backs. It will only lead to bad consequences.

Here's what everybody's been waiting to read, we're going to over some teen flirting tips now. The biggest way to flirt is to try and strike up a conversation, use as many clues as you can or what you know about them, to talk about they might be interested in. And while you are talking make eye contact and smile a lot. Try to laugh and have fun, and most importantly, relax!

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Tips for Making Small Talk

November 18, 2008 By Leave a Comment

The ability to make small talk may come naturally to some and be difficult for others but it is a skill that can be obtained with a little bit of practice and confidence.  The opportunity to make small talk presents itself on a daily basis in our lives.  Anytime you are out and about, you have the opportunity to make small talk with those around you.  While sometimes it's just a matter of politeness that leads you to engage in small talk, it can also be a great networking opportunity for you.  Practicing your small talk skills on a daily basis will give you the confidence you need to approach potential clients or colleagues at important networking events.  Also, it is important to make sure that your body language conveys a sense of confidence.  If you appear timid or uncomfortable you may put others on edge as well but if you appear confident it will help the other person to relax.  If you are unsure of yourself and hesitant to make small talk with strangers you may find yourself missing out on many opportunities in both your career and social life.  However, confidence in your ability to make small talk can put you in a great position for advancement in your career and social life.

Having confidence in yourself is critical to being able to make small talk.  Keep in mind that the other person you are chatting with is probably just as uncomfortable as you are so don't assume that they are more eloquent speaker than you are and be afraid to approach them.  Confidence is key to making small talk because without confidence, you may simply choose not to engage in small talk when the opportunity presents itself.  A lack of confidence may lead you to avoid approaching others and discourage others from approaching you.  If you lack the confidence necessary to make small talk you may miss out on meeting a lot of new people.

Keeping abreast of current events is another tip for making small talk.  Watch the news and read newspapers on a regular basis.  This will keep you informed of newsworthy local and world events.  This is important because current events can be a very easy subject for small talk.  Being aware of what is going on in the world will make you seem educated and will prove that you are a concerned citizen who takes an interest in important issues.  Also, being aware of current events is critical to being able to make small talk because it allows you to speak intelligently on a wide variety of subjects.  Keep in mind that you don't always have to be the one to start a conversation so it's not enough to have a few tidbits of information prepared for small talk.  You also have to be ready and able to respond to whatever subject your companion brings up in an attempt to engage you in small talk.  If you keep yourself informed of a wide variety of subjects by utilizing newspapers, the Internet and news programs, you will find yourself more prepared to engage in small talk.

Listening is also a very important tip for making small talk.  It is one thing to be able to strike up a conversation but it is another thing to really keep up a conversation, especially with a stranger.  One way to maintain a conversation is to really listen to your companion.  Listening carefully will ensure that you hear all the details that your companion offers.  Use the information that you obtain to expand the conversation by asking questions about something they said earlier in the conversation or offering a personal anecdote that relates to a story they have just told you.  Listening really enhances your ability to make small talk for a number of reasons.  First it gives you ways to expand the conversation by asking pertinent questions or relating a story they tell to a personal experience.  Listening also helps you make small talk by encouraging the other person to continue talking.  If they can tell you are really interested in what they have to say because you are listening so intently, they will be encouraged to maintain the conversation instead of making an excuse to end the conversation quickly.

Finally, the key to making small talk is knowing when and how to end the conversation.  Small talk isn't meant to last very long and it can become tedious and uncomfortable if it extends past a certain amount of time.  Even if things are going well and both parties are enjoying the small talk, ending the conversation before it begins to wane is important.  If you are uncomfortable saying goodbye or ending a conversation have a few well rehearsed exit lines to end the conversation quickly.

Small talk is an important part of our daily lives.  While it can be avoided, it is really not anything to be afraid of and small talk can lead to exciting developments in your career and social life.  Engaging in small talk makes you seem more approachable and if you are able to make small talk with ease, people will be more inclined to let you in on potential business deals or let you know about social events that they are aware of in the area.  Never underestimate the power or small talk and never assume that you are not capable of making small talk.

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Tips for Dating Someone With Children

November 18, 2008 By 1 Comment

Dating can be complicated enough on it's own but when there are children involved things can get even trickier.  Many people shy away from starting a relationship with a partner who already has children and many singles with children are also apprehensive about starting a relationship.  While dating a person with children can lead to a wonderful relationship it is important to exercise caution to ensure that the children are not hurt by the relationship.  While the existence of children in a dating situation does complicate things, it does not have to destine the relationship to failure.

Deciding when to meet the children of the person you are dating is a crucial element of the equation.  It is not necessary to meet the children on the first date.  Doing so can be confusing to the children if the relationship does not progress and you are soon out of the picture.  While it is important that the person you are dating disclose that they have children, meeting them is not a necessary first step.  It's important that the relationship has a chance to grow before bringing the children into the equation.  After all, while the children may be an important part of your partner's life, you have to have some time to decide if you think this is a worth while relationship before deciding if you want to become a parental figure in the children's lives.  If you have been dating for awhile and things are starting to become more serious, now would be a good time to meet your partner's children and get to know them as well.  You don't want to rush into meeting the children too early in your relationship but you also don't want to wait too long either.  Waiting until marriage plans are already under way will leave the children feeling helpless and powerless about the situation.  Meeting the children of the person you are dating is an important step in your relationship and the timing of this step is also very important.

Once you have met the children involved it is important to be cognizant of their feelings.  While you are in the relationship with their parent it is also crucial to build a relationship with the children as well if you plan to continue your dating relationship.  This may be difficult if the children are resentful.  If the biological parent is out of the picture due to death or divorce, the children may see you as trying to replace their parent and they may act angry or hurtful towards you.  It is important to bond with the children while assuring them that you are not trying to replace their parent in any way.  Sitting down with your partner and his or her children to discuss what type of role you will play in the lives of the children is a good idea.  This gives everyone the opportunity to express their feelings and it is also an opportunity to establish boundaries regarding discipline and decision making.   Children like to feel as though they have some control in the situation so allowing them to express their feelings will help your relationship with the children to grow.

After you have begun to bond with the children it is time to once again focus your attention on the dating relationship.  Meeting your partner's children is important as is establishing and maintaining functioning relationships with them but it's critical that you not lose sight of your relationship with your partner after the children have been introduced into the relationship.  At this juncture of the relationship it is crucial to balance time with your partner and the children.  It's fine to continue activities with the entire family but it's also important to have time alone with your partner as you did earlier in the relationship.  Setting aside time just for you and your partner will ensure that the relationship continues to grow and flourish.

Dating someone with children can be complicated but following the tips provided above will help to ease the situation.  Be sure to wait until the relationship has become serious before involving the children so that they do not have unrealistic expectations.  Once you decide to meet the children, take things slowly and be aware of their feelings.  Following their lead will ensure that you are not moving too quickly.  After the children are involved, remember to put aside time for just you and your partner to continue your own relationship.  These tips will help to create a loving relationship with both your partner and his or her children.

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Tips for Dating on a Budget

November 18, 2008 By 1 Comment

Impressing your date doesn't have to diminish your wallet.  With a little resourcefulness and imagination you can plan dates that are a lot of fun and also very inexpensive.  Not only will you be saving a load of money but your date will be impressed with your creativity.  Inexpensive date ideas can include coffee houses, outdoor activities, theater and the arts, cooking and other fun activities.

A trip to a coffee house is an excellent inexpensive date idea if you are dating on a budget.  The price of a couple of cups of coffee and a dessert to share is next to nothing compared to dinner for two at an expensive restaurant.  You and your date could spend a few hours sipping coffee and enjoying your dessert while getting to know each other through casual conversation.  A coffee house is a great place to bring a date because the atmosphere is very relaxed and you can sit and chat for hours without interruption.

Another date idea which is very inexpensive is to take a trip to a local park.  On a nice day you and your date can spend the day walking, rollerblading, playing Frisbee or just people watching.   Also, pack a picnic and set up a blanket and enjoy your lunch on the grass in the park.  After lunch lay back and watch the clouds for awhile.  You will be surprised how often the clouds change and take on new shapes.  If the park has a lake, you may even be able to rent a canoe or paddle boat for a very small fee.  Spending the day outdoors and engaging in relaxing and enjoyable activities is an excellent inexpensive date idea for those who are dating on a budget.

While the theater and the arts are generally thought of as being expensive activities you can even turn these activities into inexpensive date ideas if you are dating on a budget.  Most cities have local theater companies that perform their own renditions of Broadway plays.  For a fraction of what you would pay to see a play performed by a major production company, you can sit front and center in a small theater.  Another inexpensive date idea is to visit your city's local art museum.  You can spend the day viewing the different pieces of artwork together and talking about what you like best about each piece.  Even movie theaters can be great inexpensive date ideas.  Second run movie theaters often show movies a little later then their release date but the ticket prices are usually very reasonable.  These theaters often offer ticket prices that are even less than matinee prices.  With a little creativity even the theater can be a great date idea for those on a budget.

Cooking is another inexpensive date idea for those dating on a budget.  You and your date could plan a romantic meal, shop for the necessary ingredients and spend the night cooking and eating the meal you create.  This is an excellent date idea because it is a great way for you and your date to spend quality time together.  If you take your time preparing the meal, you will have plenty of time to enjoy the company of your date.  The two of you will also be working together as a team which fosters a bond between you.  Taking a cooking class together can also be a great inexpensive date idea.  Many colleges offer cooking classes that are very affordable.  You and your date could sign up for an exotic cooking class together and look forward to learning enough to create some of your favorite dishes.

Yet another tip for dating on a budget is to spend the night playing board games in your very own living room.  Choose a few games from your collection and challenge your date to some friendly competition.  You will be surprised at how much fun you have playing some of the games from your childhood.  Not only are these game a lot of fun but they can also be an excellent way to get to know each other better.  Playing games that require you to use your creative side instead of just relying on luck give you a chance to really show your date who you are.

Dating on a budget is not impossible and it doesn't have to be boring.  Often some of the most inexpensive date ideas are also some of the best ways to really get to know your date.  The relaxed atmosphere that these date ideas provide allows a couple to be themselves and enjoy their time together.

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Speed Dating Tips

November 18, 2008 By Leave a Comment

Speed dating was introduced by Rabbi Yaacov Deyo in the 1990s.  He originally invented speed dating as a way for young, Jewish singles to meet other singles.  Since the advent of speed dating, it has become increasingly popular throughout the United States as well as many other countries and in many major cities there are nightclubs hosting speed dating nights.  The basic format of speed dating is to invite an equal number of men and women to a location and set up a system where each man has 5-10 minutes to speak to each woman.   Generally the women will be seated at a table for two and the men are given one table to start at and have a predetermined amount of time to get to know the woman at this table and determine whether or not they are compatible.  After the time limit the woman stay where they are seated and the men move to the next table.  This process continues until each of the couples has had their date.  At the conclusion of each date, you check off whether or not you are interested in meeting with this person further and at the conclusion of the night, if your date was also interested in meeting you, the event organizers provide you with the contact information for your matches.  Speed dating can be a lot of fun but it does move quickly and it's best to go into your first speed dating experience prepared.

Since speed dating allows you a very limited amount of time to get to know each date making a good first impression is critical.  Looks may not be everything but when you are being judged on such a short amount of time looking your best won't hurt.  Take care in your appearance on the night of the speed dating event and be sure to smile.  A sloppy appearance may result in your date mentally rejecting you before the date even starts and not putting much effort into their answers to your questions or to trying to get to know you.  A polished appearance on the night of your speed dates will ensure that you make an excellent first impression and ensure that your dates are eager to get to know you better.

Going into a speed dating situation prepared is also very important.  Again your time is limited so now is not the time to engage in a lot of mindless small talk.  Take the opportunity to ask engaging, open-ended questions that will really help to determine whether or not you have met a potential match.  Also, use this opportunity to ask questions that you know would be sure to eliminate a potential match.  For example if you are not interested in dating a smoker, be sure to ask whether or not your date smokes.  Knowing what you want to ask ahead of time will ensure that you are asking your dates relevant questions.

Punctuality is also very important to speed dating.  You would never want to be late for any date because it's impolite to keep your date waiting but in speed dating it could really cost you.  Since speed dating moves quickly, you may arrive late to find that your spot has been given away or that you have missed one or more of your dates.  Be sure to arrive on time for your speed dates to ensure you don't miss any opportunities.

Speed dating is all about having a good time but it's also about finding potential matches so while you are on your dates, answer questions honestly and be yourself.  The more honest you are during the dates the more likely you are to find a well suited match.  Giving answers just because you think they are what your date wants to hear could result in the matches you find not really being your type.  While they might be fun to date for awhile, they probably won't be a good long term match for you.

Once you have made a few potential matches, do not wait too long after your speed dates to contact those matches.  Both you and your dates may have made several matches that night and it may be difficult to remember much detail about each date.  The sooner you contact them the more likely it is that both of you will remember the details of your date.

Exercising caution is another important tip for speed dating.  While your contact information is only given out if both you and your date indicate that you are a match, first impressions can sometimes be wrong so be careful with those you choose to make contact with after the speed date.  Try setting up future dates in well populated, public places so that you will not be exposing yourself to unnecessary danger.

Speed dating is becoming an increasingly popular way to meet potential matches.  It can be a very fun experience and following the tips provided above will help to allow you to have a good time, meet a wonderful partner and remain safe.

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