Active Relationship

There's nothing like the feeling that a crush brings. For a teenager, those feelings are exciting and hopeful; for parents of teens, those feelings may center more on anguish and worry. Whether you are experiencing your first spark of love or are struggling to find the best way to deal with your child's foray into dating, read on for the best teen love advice.

We all have our own romance ideas about what makes a relationship special and successful. At age 16, those ideas may be very different than our criteria at age 46, but it's important to recognize that what we experience during our first real romantic relationship can set the tone for how we conduct our love life going forward.

If you are a parent with a teenager in love, there are a few guiding principles that you can use to both foster and monitor the relationship. The first, of course, is to provide a solid example of what a loving, respectful relationship looks like. Children learn from the models with which they are presented. To ensure that your teen relationship advice is accepted, you must follow the proverb of "practicing what you preach."

You can hardly expect your teenager to make thoughtful decisions about dating practices if you have not. If you are married, ensure that you and your spouse are respectful and supportive of each other. Try to communicate effectively so your teen can see what a healthy argument looks like. Remember to keep a balance of activities that keep you happy as both a couple and individuals.

If you are single but dating, be sure that your dating practices mirror what you want your child to do. Choose potential partners using reputable resources or introductions through trusted friends or loved ones. Slowly get to know a potential suitor through phone calls, and ensure that the first date is both casual and held in a public place. Providing an example of healthy dating will influence your teen more than any words ever could. A teenager can sense when a double standard is being presented.

Above all, the best teen love advice is to cherish and love yourself, for only when we truly respect and care for ourselves can we care for others. If you are a teenager in love, it's a fun and insightful exercise to write down all of the things that you adore about your boyfriend or girlfriend, and then circle any of the same qualities that you feel that you posses. As humans, we often choose people that we feel are on our level—socially, intelligence wise and in terms of looks. Make sure that your crush can offer you as much as you offer them. That way, you can grow and learn from each other.

To deepen the connection you have with a boyfriend or girlfriend, its fun to talk about future goals together. For instance, does he or she want to go to college? What would they study? What is their dream job? When you know these things about a person, you can help them stay focused on their goals. An important piece of teen love advice is remembering that loving someone means wanting them to be happy and most people are happiest when their opportunities are unlimited.

Consider this in your own life: Would you rather your parents tell you "no" when you bring up something you'd like to or would you rather they support you and say "yes"? If your boyfriend wants to spend the summer at a sailing camp or your girlfriend wants to take some fashion design classes over spring break, even if it means that you'll be apart for a short time, support the decision that you think will make them happy.

Remember, too, that love is honest, and that means being honest with each other, as well as with your friends and family. If your boyfriend or girlfriend makes you keep any part of your relationship secret, then that is a sign that they may not have your best interest at heart.

The best teen love advice is largely common sense, but when the endorphins that love brings go rushing around your brain, sometimes it's difficult to keep a relationship in perspective. Above all, as a teen in love, your boyfriend or girlfriend should add to your life, not take away from it. Anyone who asks you to give up friends, time with family, school work or activities that you enjoy may not be the best match.

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